Women

I was surfing the website of Kelab Isteri Taat out of curiosity the other day and as I dug through the writings and the linking, I must confess that it left me speechless and numb. 

I tried to write something about it but I just couldn’t.    The thing is, I doubt that I can discuss about the things that they talk about without sounding like I’m downgrading all women. 

One thing for sure, all respectable, honorable women will never talk about their intimate relations, what more describe the details, openly.  That’s all that I manage to comment about this S**maniac Wives Club, as it should be called.

Never mind these women.  If they think that being a slave and a whore would grant them the highest jannah then be it.  

But here’s a question that we need to ponder:  Why is ‘women’ often discussed like a subject if not an object?  Why are there so many books on ‘Menjadi Wanita Solehah’, ‘Ciri-ciri Isteri Mithali’ but there are so few and almost none at all about ‘Menjadi Suami Soleh’, or ‘Ciri-ciri Suami Mithali’?

Are men naturally perfect and smart that they need no guidance as to how to care for his family, how to love his wife or how to lead a marriage?   Are women so weak and dumb that they need to be guided all the time about everything? 

If this is true than why do we see so many men in Pusat Serenti and so many women in Universities?  Why do we see so many husbands crossing border for pleasure while so many wives left to care for themselves and the kids.   Is this the result of not having enough books on how to be a good man compared to books on how to be a good woman?

If women are that weak and men are so strong then why do we see women with flying careers but still strong enough to cook and care for the family and home, while men with flying careers aren’t able to do anything else? 

Men are made of muscles and hard bones and women are made of soft tissues and emotions but like it or not, all the muscles and bones of men are no longer useful nowadays.  Men don’t need to hunt for food or protect his family from wild animals anymore.   

But still men are supposed to be looked-upon as leaders of the family because he supposedly holds the most responsibility.  Well, in theory this is true.  But practically, the men just need to go to work and provide some money to the family and that’s all. 

The women, however, in most cases, also help to provide for the family in order to lighten the burden of the husbands and on top of that, need to know whether the kids have extra class, or sport activity and what the whole family is having for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day and whether the school uniforms and office attires are ready every day and whether the toilets need some cleaning and the floor need mopping for the week.

Therefore, in which way do the men claim to have more responsibility?  If the muscles and the hard bones are not used to clean the house, iron the clothes and run errands like pick-up the children to and from everywhere after work then what is the use of a man in the house but to become a burden to the wife?

Just think about it, why do men need to rest after a hard day’s work at the office and women don’t?  A woman would go straight to the kitchen and start working once she reached home after office but a man would go straight to the sofa and unable to even make a cup of coffee for himself once he came back from work.  

And why men need to spend time sleeping on Sundays to make up for the tiring week but women spent their Sundays doing spring cleaning?

We often hear a man announcing proudly that ‘boys will be boys’ when he needs to go play sports with his friends and hang around mamak’s restaurants.   Well, let me tell you this:  if you are a boy, then don’t expect your family to respect you like a man!   

And in which way does a boy deserve to be respected as a leader?

I’m not anti-man or anything but I’m sick of women who don’t know where they stand beside a man.   I’m sick of women who would throw and slave themselves to men thinking that that is what Allah made women for. 

Bear in mind that a woman is not made to please a man but to be complete a man.   

Women are as human as men are, not some object or subject to be discussed and debated.   Women are made with views, opinions, characters, attitudes, traits and attributes and weakness and flaws just like men.   Women are not to be tamed and ordered around like she has no mind of her own.  If Allah wanted women to be that way then Allah would have made women animals instead.

So, all women out there, pick yourself up and put yourself high.  Remember, men are made to take care of women and not the other way around.  ‘Taking care’ doesn’t only mean paying for the house that you are living in, it means that he must also be able to bring you a cup of coffee and cook for you when you need a break.   

A happy marriage is when a wife stood right beside her husband and not behind him and never under his foot like what the Kelab Isteri Taat thinks it’s supposed to be.