How Much Are You Worth, Woman?

Hi all!  I’ve been so busy with God knows what lately…with the whole family taking turns in getting cold and fever, I just couldn’t update this blog as often (or as seldom) as I always do. 

But here’s a thing that’s been bothering me lately.  I came across this article in Sinar Harian about how women would do anything, even torture themselves in order to please their husbands and make sure that their husbands remain true to them.  The writer also told a story about how his friends use to refer to their wives as the ‘walking-cupboard’ and other not so nice names just because the wives are getting bigger by the day. 

The writer cheekily exposed how the men downgrade, disrespect and insult their own wives without the slightest feeling of guilt, totally forgetting that once upon a time ago these are the women that they went crazy for.  And note that they not only feel proud, but even thought that it is funny to insult their own wives in front of their friends…

As someone who has been in and out of the man’s world, I’m not surprise with such attitude of men.   It bothers me to hear how some men speak disrespectfully about their wives and it bothers me more to see it in writings as if it is an accepted practice and a no big deal. 

But as I keep repeating in my writings, the men who have this kind of attitude are usually those with very little self-confidence and who are suffering from a certain level of inferiority complex.  These men just need to brag in order to hide their insecurity.  They are afraid that if they don’t brag, then people might be able to see how ‘small’ they really are. 

In other words, they are afraid that people might sense that they are not ‘man enough’ or ‘good enough’ to deserve some kind of respect from their friends and the society.   They believe that by belittling their wives and talk about having mistress or second wives would give them some kind of a boost for their damaged self-esteem. 

It is sad that in our society, even in today’s modern world, to still see men with 18^th century’s mentality where they see women as lower species.   They talk about their wives like she knows nothing and worth nothing.  Often these men paid no attention to their wives’ traits or ability and provide no support at all for her to pursue her interest.   They indirectly referred to their wives as housemaids – the person who is expected to care for the home and their needs and that is about all a wife is. 

Well, one thing I can say about this type of men is that they are not worth it.  And I just cannot comprehend how or why there are women who choose to put up with these men forever.    

But then, I try to look at it from a different angle – from the mens’ point of view.  As people always say that I have a mind of a man, (as evident in my political writings) I guess I am sort of ‘qualified’ to give views from the man’s side.   Let’s explore the possible reasons on why some men look down on women – be it their wives or their colleagues:

Here are some of the reasons that I can think of…

1.    Women are being looked down by men because of their lack of interest in serious issues.   

Admit it, some women take petty things too seriously eg. soap operas or fashions and in many cases would do anything in order not to miss the next episode on TV or the latest design in the mall.   But women often show less interest in what’s going on in the world today.  While men choose the news and documentaries, women choose romance movies and ghost stories.

For this, the men take it that we are simply unable to digest the more serious subject, and that is why we resort to petty, insignificant subjects.  In other words, they think of us as ‘dumb’ and thus, lose respect towards us.   

Sadly, I agree with the men but I don’t think that I’m betraying all women by saying this.  I know for a fact that in many ways, women are smarter than men, it’s just that some of us refuse to be smart by letting the men do all the thinking.  Well, don’t.  This is why the world is so screwed up today.   

The men may be entrusted by Allah to be the leader, but they can’t lead or do anything (even make their own coffee or make the bed) unless we show them how or ask them to.   Like Margaret Thatcher once said:  “If you want something to be said – ask a man.  But if you want something to be done - then ask a woman.” 

I admit that I have trouble comprehending woman’s magazines.  And as a matter of fact I never buy any, because I don’t see the significant of the gossips, advertisements or the art of applying make-up in every page and every issue.   Unless, you are in the beauty business which needs you to know all these, these magazines don’t help boost your image in the eyes of the men, most importantly, your husband.   

I’m not saying that we should not strive to be beautiful.  I believe in striving to be beautiful – all women should too.  But I’m just saying that we mustn’t take these as the only thing that matters in this world. 

Being obsessed and all excited about the petty things is the common mistake women make that eventually left them with nothing to talk about with their husbands.  Well, how do we expect the husbands to spend time with us if they can’t talk to us about anything because we don’t really know anything. 

You can’t expect to have a conversation with your husband about soap operas and make-ups and gossips and fashions or what our next door neighbor just bought?   Doesn’t it makes sense now if your husband gets bored at home and need to go hang around his friends at every opportunity? 

So, women should start looking at the world from a higher angle if we really want men to look up on us.    

2.    Men look down on women because women choose to be down there by showing lack of dignity and acting like slaves.

Like the writer in Sinar Harian said, the women have been struggling too hard to keep their men.   It seems like the more a husband condemns the wife the harder the wife will try to please him.  But the wife didn’t realize that the more the she tries to please the husband, the bigger his ego will be, and so the worse things will turn out for her.

And this is just so sad.  If a man loves you, you don’t have to struggle to keep him with you.  He would have loved you in any look, any size and any shape….and struggles to keep you with him, okay?  If you need to struggle to maintain your beauty, which you must, that is for you.  Not for him and you must make that very clear to him. 

Now women, bear this in mind:  If your husband treats you like a slave, that’s because you treat him like a king.   If he treats you like garbage, that’s because you act like one – by showing no value and no pride for yourself.   

You know, there’s a lot of difference between a husband and a king or a husband and a boss.  Husbands are not allowed to boss or slave us around – and Allah has made that clear.  They are supposed to take good care of us – in every way, and never the other way around.   

So, keep your dignity in check – stop thinking of yourself as a slave and stop acting like garbage.  If your husband insists on being the king, then remember that you are the queen.   

3.    Men have no respect for women because they see women as desperate, helpless species that totally depend on them to survive.

Men know for a fact that even if they cheat on their wives, there is nothing that the wives would do but cry and go into deep depression and eventually accept their fates and continue to serve and be obedient and loyal to them - like a true slave.    

Well, this must change.  Men must know that a wife is a person with dignity and pride and brain and deserves a good, happy life.  Therefore, women should never look or act desperate when dealing with men, especially the husbands.   Make it clear to the men that you are not some homeless scumbag who needs them to provide you with shelter and food.   Instead, it’s their duty to provide you with all these.  You are there, in their homes because they chose you and they want you.   So you have every right to be respected by them.

You see, as human beings, the ultimate creation of God, we are provided with brains to think.  Why? Because life is all about making choices.  We control our own lives not others.  You can choose to be a slave or a master, a wife or a buddy, a bore or a fun person, a charming mistress or a scary monster to your husband.  You can make your husband respect you and you can make him disrespect you.  But we can’t expect anybody to change from disrespecting you to respecting you just because we told him to.   

In order to change someone’s attitude towards you, we must first change our way of thinking or doing things.  If the method we used didn’t work, then change it again because if you keep using the same method, be sure that you will only get the same result.  

But if all the methods didn’t work, then I am telling you again that even as a woman,  you have a choice whether to put up with the pain and the insult, or get the hell out and find a new life.   Whatever you choose, you only have yourself to congratulate or to blame. 

It’s all really up to you, woman.   No woman should torture herself and struggle just to please and keep the insecure, insensitive, unloving man with her.  I mean,….have some self-worth please… 

****

By writing this, I’m not saying that I have a perfect fairy-tale marriage though my love story did look like a great romance movie.   Of course, we have gone through the best and worst times but the most important thing is that we respect each other, equally - with me knowing full well that he is the Master of the house and him knowing full well that I’m the Lady of our home.

Inferiority Complex of the Simple Mind

I was involved in a program that brought the pro-government cyber writers together last weekend.  As a ‘veteran’ cyber-warrior, it was so sweet to be able to meet up with those of the same category.   Meeting old friends is a thing that you would never want to miss.   It also brought back the nostalgia of the time when I first got involved in this cyber political writings. 

Way back in 1998, there were only a few of us who would fight off the lies and slanders thrown at our leadership by the oppositions.   Of these few, many of us were not involved in politics in any way at all but were pulled into the cyber-world by our love for the nation.   

Efforts were made to contact each other and we finally got together and become friends.   With the courage and wisdom of namely, Bapak3, Pang5husin, Kuntakinte and Azhar Ahmad and the help from a few others like Kak Long, Tengkudinnn .. we decided to form a Kelab Maya UMNO (KMU) in 1999 which is dedicated to provide assistance for UMNO in the cyberworld.   

The idea was presented to Tun Mahathir and received his blessings.   An official launching was held in the year 2000 and from there onwards, the team grows and become stronger and more organized.  

Like all organizations, the leaders and the members of the club come and go as years go by.  The club is now led by Jebon who has taken it to a much higher step.   The name too, has changed but the objective remains the same. 

Today, we see so many eager young dedicated warriors doing what we did back then.  (I admit that I’ve lost that eagerness).   Many of them started off in KMU and are still very much attached to it while some are not.  Whichever, they are all better equipped than we were, in every way.   Good for them, I must say.  This also means that UMNO has finally come to its senses by acknowledging the importance of the internet.

During the 3 day program, I was asked once too often on why I stopped writing (on politics, in the papers and the net, they mean).  Well friends, I don’t. 

I am still writing about politics - elsewhere, not in this blog - but as a ghost.  Don’t ask me why. 

This blog is personal and I don’t promote it to the world.   As I said, this blog only meant to help me clear my head from all the political issues that I have to deal with every day whether I like it or not because it’s my job.  But apart from it, I have a life and I tend to live before I die.   This blog keeps me close to who I really am.   I’m not born for politics.  In fact, I think I was born for show-business but unfortunately, came out in the wrong side of the world at the wrong time. ....haha..

Yes, I have had haters and I have had loyal readers.  At one time, a lady went through so much trouble to find out where I work and finally got me on the phone but immediately lost her enthusiasm once she heard a woman’s voice at the end of the line.  What can I say… “sorry, I’m a lady?”   

And those emails that referred to me as ‘saudara, abang, pak cik, tuan’ etc…. aahh..that’s just funny.     

Yeap, I was thought to be a man because of my ‘merciless’ writings and my masculine name.    I guess, name does make a difference in a person’s character.   And this character of mine is what drags me into controversies and problems ever since my schooldays.    

Everywhere I go, I have always been the one breaking the rules.  But, I broke the rules politely.  I was taught good manners by my family.  I never talk back to teachers and I never use bad language as I didn’t know any.   And as a convent-school girl, manners even matters much more to me.   In convent, the nuns taught us manners in ‘civic’ class after assembly, on top of the official ‘tatarakyat’ class.  So, even though I was naughty, I was also polite. 

Sorry to bore you with my background. 

But, if you noticed, there have been many writings in this blog about courtesy and manners and the Malay’s mentality.   And I just can’t stop thinking and write about it especially after that three day program with the cyber community.   I’ve witness with my own eyes how in a few years, people can change to the better… or worse and how they thought of themselves the other way around.   

The three-day program got me thinking hard about how chronic this issue on manners have become in our society.   It seems that today, not having good manners is considered ‘hebat’ or ‘taiko’ and ‘respected’.    Some are even proud to show how ‘bad’ they are or they can be..as if it gives them status and a certain class or something. 

Malays are said to have a very chronic inferiority complex and I believe this is true.   That’s why most Malays revert to working with the government, or better still as teachers. 

You go to a kampung and you can bet that the majority of the graduates from that kampung choose ‘teaching’ as a career.   Why?  Because they get to work half-day and not compete with other races and don’t have to deal with real pressure of working in private sectors.  The fast-moving world and the need to look and act professional are too much for them to handle.  They may be graduates but they have never read a single book in their life except those required for their studies and maybe some love novels and religious books.   And there is this issue of poor English, besides terrible social skills. 

Of course they can socialize, but only among the same races of the same social category.   All these make them feel inferior.

It is normal for humans to dream to become someone and crave for status, glamour or some kind acknowledgment, somehow, somewhere.    The problem with this, in the Malays is that they often want to get there the easy way.  They don’t want to improve themselves by working hard and compete in the real world with others.  They don’t want to do extra reading or thinking.   They want to live as complacently as ever but at the same time they want to be somebody too.  So, they become ‘complexly inferior’. 

Therefore, when they managed to get somewhere, they start to think of themselves like they are Goh Chok Tong or Ananda Krishnan or may be Donald Trump and act like they own the world.  The irony is that the real Malay tycoon, like Syed Mokhtar Albukhari, is such a humble gentleman.  

The Malays are impatient.  Not only they want to get there easily, they want it fast too and as a result they put their standard as low as possible so they can get there faster. 

Look at our movies, some shoot for only 2 weeks and the scripts are prepared overnight and the producers, directors, actors and crews already think that they have given their best.  Look at our singers, one song is enough to call themselves artists or divas or celebrities.   For some bloggers, ‘high alexa ranking’ can make them feel at the top of the world already.   For some politicians, titles are taken as license to act arrogantly.  For the ordinaries, luxurious house and cars change them into snobbish.  And on top of all those, second wife is taken as the symbol of status.

You know, glass will always be glass no matter if it’s carved into a diamond-like shape.  A diamond will always be diamond even if it fell into the cow’s poo.  

I’m not trying to put anybody down but I just want to stress that you don’t get to be younger just by having a facelift.    If your heart is young, you are young no matter how people look at you. 

 So, does status.  You don’t lift your status just by having money and glamour and numbers of wives.  In fact, you might just lower it because everybody knows that most women who agree to be the second or third or fourth are either desperate, or materialistic bimbos, or simply dumb.   Of course not all of them fall into these three categories.  Some may have their own exceptional reasons but face it, most of them become your added responsibility not because they love you or you love them.

The point is that, the Malays should get over this inferiority complex.  You don’t have to crave for status.  Just be who you are and you’ll be fine and respected anyway.   If you are well behaved, have good manners and an honest work, be wise and smart and carry yourself like a true professional, then you will surely be looked up upon as someone of a high status. 

Bear in mind that a truly respectable man doesn’t have to brag about how he is being, or should be respected.  If you have to brag about it, then you must have known deep inside that you don’t deserve it. 

With that, I just want to record my highest respect to my fellow long time cyber-warrior friends, especially the pioneers and the dedicated hard-cores that I mentioned above.   You all have made history – remember that.   

And thank you for the friendship…. 

Hypocrisy And The Malays

I must admit that even as a woman myself, I find women complicated.  I had a long night out with my girlfriends the other day and I found out that my mind cannot comprehend the fact that there are women who actually cried for failing to grab the latest LV or Prada handbags while on visits overseas.  Or the fact that women can talk about handbags for hours…Believe me, I tried my best to make sense of the importance of the subject but I just couldn’t. 

It’s not that I despise handbags or don’t really care about quality or brands.  I personally love Bonia for its no-nonsense and serious-looking designs and I’m still in love with my Alain Delon which I bought two years ago but I bought them for the sake of practicality and longevity.  And I’m now using a handbag that cost me close to three hundred, of a brand that I’ve never heard of, and it works fine for me. 

I don’t buy things for fashion or status or girly-satisfaction.   If the quality is perfect and it’s practical, any brand or no-brand will do.  Nevertheless, I can’t think of anything else to say about these bags except that they help carry my three year old Carlo Rino wallet (I don’t do purse) and comb.   Not mentioning that I’d rather spend on books than handbags..but between shoes and books…hmm…I’ll think twice because I love shoes.  But I usually choose books because I have other shoes to wear but I can’t read the same book over and over, can I? 

Still, as much as I love shoes, I can’t talk about them for hours, but I surely can do so, about books.

Now, the thing is, I don’t see or do things the way other women do.  For that, my hubby always teases me of being a man in the head but a woman in the heart and I thought of him as vice-versa.   Perhaps that’s how we complete each other and find peace within one another. 

I’m not a romantic person, neither is my partner.  I hate romance novels and love stories.  Since at a very young age, I go for fast, mind-challenging, heart-pumping, complicatedly-twisting novels and movies.   My hubby will go for fast, action-packed, martial arts kind of stories.   I listen to Redfm., Mixfm and Hitz and I love Bon Jovi, MJ and all the energetic songs – slow or fast doesn’t matter.  My hubby listens to Sinarfm and laugh out loud at Salleh Yaacob’s jokes while I try to hide my frown because I don’t get it and it bothers me that my hubby does.    

And this is what I would like to touch on today, which is out of my ordinary that is, ‘love’. (Sorry girls, it’s not about handbag – go write your own blog if you want to talk about handbags hihi..) 

While on the night out, my girlfriends and I took the ‘pleasure’ observing the couples around us and we all agree that the woman that the bald Malay man was holding passionately is not his wife because if she is, then he wouldn’t be holding her like that.  And I’m sure you readers would agree too.

Now, don’t you think that it is bad enough that Malay men are ashamed of showing affection to his wife but it’s even worse that they are proud to do so to other woman?   

For this, men may be the biggest idiot because they not only can’t understand women but they can’t understand themselves too.   Or else, why the hell did a man marry the woman, when he actually wanted to be with this other woman?  

Do you notice that Malay men likes to go for a ‘real muslimah’  a when finding a wife – that is, the down-to-earth, quiet, soft, obedient kind of girl, but as time goes by, and as they mature and see the world, they get bored with the wife and started looking for a lively, funny, outgoing girl to enjoy life with?

So, if a wife is not meant to enjoy life with, then what is she?  A servant?  A furniture? 

This is a problem of Malay mentality, not just men.  Malays are always concerned of others’ perception, even in choosing a life-partner.  Hypocrisy is in the blood of the Malays whereby they don’t even know anymore what they really want or who they really are.   They just do things according to the society’s expectation. 

Since the society has listed a certain criteria of a good wife, so all Malay men just go for it – find a wife that fits the criteria and believe that they will live happily ever after and eventually go to heaven.   ‘Love’ is just a matter of talking.  The society’s happy, he is happy and the hell with the good wife if she’s not happy.  After all, a good wife is supposed to bear the pains and sufferings and be happy only in the afterlife…??!!

The saddest part of it all is that the tiny little brains of these men find it amusing to hurt their wives’ feelings. 

Have you ever watched Malay dramas or movies or listen to Malay radio channel?  Do you notice that the issue, conversation or joke they made mostly revolves around a man’s dream of polygamy?  Disgustingly low, don’t you think?  And I almost puke when I came across a movie titled ‘bini-biniku gangster’ in the newspaper…  

A married man going crazy over other woman and wives fighting over a husband is viewed as funny in our society.  I mean, ewe!  How low can we go?    What about the womens’ pain and sufferings, families divided and torn apart, kids growing up without the father’s full attention and care and a mother who is always sad and depressed....what about all these? 

And how dare these men talk about upholding the sunnah…?? 

My advice to these men, don’t marry a decent, shy woman if you have a taste for an outgoing, lively woman.  Don’t marry a muslimah when you have a taste for a GRO. 

Go marry a GRO in the first place if that’s where your heart belongs.  This way, no woman would be heartbroken and no family will be broken.  You are happy, your GRO wife is happy, so live happily ever after…and you may most probably go to heaven too because you have saved a GRO from the underworld and you didn’t hurt any other woman’s feelings or caused your kids sufferings. 

From a different angle, a muslimah doesn’t have to be stereotype – shy, soft, obedient, quiet and down-to-earth.  Being happy and lively doesn’t make you less muslimah.  Some muslimah may be a little hard-headed, some may be authoritarian in her approach but that’s what makes her human – her differences or uniqueness.  As long as she is not stepping out of the line, a man who claimed to love her should accept her as she is.  

Bear in mind that you can never disrespect and hurt someone you love and find it amusing.  If you can do that to your wife, it means that you don’t love her.  Period.   Do you seriously think you love your wife when you always try to avoid going out together and prefer to be with friends instead of her?   Take a moment to ponder, what is your wife to you?  Do you even respect her?   Do you even care how she feels?

So, it is important to detect ‘love’ before you get married.   Be truly sure that she or he is the one.  Look into your partner’s eyes, and not the wallet or the car or the face or the body to confirm that he or she is the only one that you ever want to spend your life with.  Picture yourself holding each other forever and getting old together.    If you can picture it with a smile, then you have found your true love. 

Allah has stressed that we are all made in pairs so that we may find peace.   I tend to believe that those who don’t find peace with their pairs had actually chosen the wrong one or just, somehow deserved each other. 

A pair means two – if you married more than one woman then it’s not a pair anymore and therefore, there will never be peace upon you.  

Although it’s allowed for men to have more than one wives but don’t ever forget that the permission came with a warning, that is:  if you can’t be fair, you better stick to only one woman.  And the next line goes:  Sesungguhnya kamu tidak akan boleh berlaku adil (You can never, ever be fair!)  So, think about it.. 

Fortunately, not all Malay men are as shallow.  I’m blessed to have met one that isn’t shy to show his affection towards me at anytime as long as it doesn’t cause discomfort and awkwardness among the kids, our friends and public. 

Despite our ups and downs, our differences, and our un-romantic tastes, we always prefer to be with each other than with others.   Only once in a while that we go out separately with our own pack of friends just for the thrill of it and to put some colours to our life.  I may not be a normal kind of woman who understands handbags.  In fact, my hubby chooses all my handbags and dresses because I totally suck at it.  I may be weird, and challenging to be with.  And I am far from a ‘perfect-muslimah-wife’ image, but still our home is heaven. 

So, all men out there…if you think you deserve the respect and fit to be the master of the house, and knows the Quran and sunnahs well, take a long look at your wife and ask, ‘are you happy?’  How concerned are you if she’s not happy or you just don’t give a damn as long as you are happy? 

And all women out there, don’t force yourself to be something that you’re not just to make your husband happy.  If he loves you, he’ll accept you the way you are.  If he doesn’t, he wouldn’t care about you even if you are the most perfect-muslimah-wife type. 

Don’t take it for granted that since you’re already married, you must have loved each other, naturally.  Once in a while, you must search his or her eyes for that same sparks that used to hook you two together once upon a time ago. 

Malay men should learn that it’s not a shame to love your wife but it is shameful to show your disgustingly dirty, shallow and low-class mentality that could not think of anything else but polygamy or infidelity.   Get out of that cheap, simplistic thinking and be more intelligent, please…  Show the world that Malay men are better than what is being portrayed by our entertainment industries… 

Search for ‘peace’ in your partner’s eyes as life is not worth living without that piece of peace.   Should one day the peace somehow faded away and you found peace in somebody else’s eyes, with all due respect just be honest and don’t ever live a lie..  Wash out the hypocrisy in our blood, it’s not Islamic to live a lie, anyway….  For God’s sake, make your life worth living that it’s worth dying for. 

Anwar, Apa Seterusnya?

Terkejut, marah, bingung dan kemudian tenang.  Itulah reaksi penulis sebaik mendengar keputusan kes liwat Anwar Ibrahim, Anugerah Tuhan.   Dan seharian pula penulis terpaksa menjelaskan rasionalnya keputusan itu kepada sanak keluarga dan rakan-rakan.   Ada yang menghambur kemarahan melalui personal message dan SMS meminta penjelasan seolah-olah penulis ada kena mengena dengan mahkamah, kerajaan atau Anwar sendiri. 

Penulis faham mereka hanya inginkan keadilan dan di mata kita semua, keadilan telah tidak berlaku. 

Dengan keputusan ini, Saiful Bukhari bukan sahaja tidak dapat membela nasibnya yang dipaksa melakukan sesuatu yang jijik tanpa kerelaannya tetapi juga akan terus terpaksa menanggung cemuhan dan sindiran penyokong-penyokong Anwar.   

Namun, kita harus akur bahawa ada sesuatu yang lebih penting dari Anwar Ibrahim mahu pun Saiful Bukhari, iaitu, negara ini.   

Strategi politik Anwar Ibrahim bersama PAS dan DAP selama ini adalah untuk mencetuskan kekecohan dan huru-hara dengan niat untuk melemahkan kerajaan.  

Ini dilakukan dengan membangkitkan isu-isu perkauman iaitu memprovokasi orang-orang Melayu dengan menyentuh hak keistimewaan mereka, menghasut kaum Cina agar berprasangka buruk dan membenci Melayu termasuk segala institusi yang bertunjangkan Melayu serta mengampu kaum India konon sebagai pembela mereka di samping mengajak mereka turut serta dalam ‘game’ perkauman antara Melayu dan Cina. 

Dalam pada itu, Anwar menggambarkan dirinya sebagai satu-satunya pemimpin yang mampu menyatupadukan kesemua kaum ini.    

Walaubagaimanapun, ternyata Anwar masih gagal meyakinkan majoriti rakyat yang dirinya dan pemimpin-pemimpin PR yang lain adalah jauh lebih baik dari pemimpin Barisan Nasional.   Walaupun berjaya menawan beberapa negeri dalam PRU 2008, sokongan rakyat kepada PR semakin hari semakin susut apabila satu demi satu tembelang dan pekung pemimpin PR terdedah.  Lebih dari itu, setelah menguasai beberapa negeri, PR ternyata tidak mampu membuktikan yang mereka memiliki kredibiliti yang setara dengan BN untuk menjadi pemerintah yang baik atau lebih baik. 

Melihat dari perkembangan akhir-akhir ini di mana populariti mereka semakin merudum, Anwar dan PR sedar yang mereka tidak akan mampu memenangi PRU akan datang tanpa melakukan penipuan dan manipulasi sebagaimana yang mereka lakukan dalam pemilihan parti PKR yang lepas. 

Justeru, satu-satunya cara untuk membolehkan Anwar menjadi Perdana Menteri Malaysia adalah melalui jalan belakang iaitu melakukan rampasan kuasa ala Mesir atau Libya. 

Untuk itu, pendakwaan yang cukup kukuh dalam kes liwatnya di mahkamah adalah alasan terbaik untuk mencetuskan huru-hara dalam negara.  Maka tidak hairanlah kenapa Anwar dan barisan peguamnya tidak bersungguh-sungguh cuba menyangkal segala bukti malah secara tidak langsung mengakui liwat benar-benar berlaku atas dasar suka sama suka. 

Harapan mereka, Anwar akan didapati bersalah agar penyokongnya boleh digerakkan untuk menghancurkan Malaysia dan menggulingkan kerajaan serta Anwar ditabalkan sebagai Perdana Menteri melalui jalan singkat. 

Kuasa asing juga telah bersedia untuk masuk campur untuk memastikan Malaysia ranap sepenuhnya dan Anwar menjadi pemimpin boneka mereka.   Kerana itu, kita perhatikan media-media barat rancak menyiarkan artikel-artikel yang berbunyi mengugut kerajaan Malaysia agar membebaskan Anwar semata-mata untuk memberikan alasan untuk mereka masuk campur apabila Anwar dipenjarakan nanti.  Ini kerana mereka yakin Anwar tidak mungkin akan dibebaskan berdasarkan bukti yang terlalu amat kukuh.  

Namun, manusia merancang dan Allah S.W.T juga yang menentukan.  Ternyata rancangan barat untuk menakluk Malaysia melalui Anwar terbantut lagi apabila hakim membuat keputusan membebaskan Anwar. 

Sesungguhnya, maruah dan reputasi Saiful telah menjadi satu-satunya korban dalam peperangan politik dunia antara kuasa besar dengan Malaysia.   Sama ada Saiful sedar atau tidak, pengorbanan itu telah menyelamatkan kita semua dari kemusnahan.

Tak dapat dibayangkan sejauh mana dan selama mana penyokong Anwar akan membuat huru-hara jika dia dipenjara.  Dan sebanyak mana kos untuk mengawal mereka setiap hari.  Tentu saja ini tidak berbaloi untuk kita lalui semata-mata kerana Anwar, mahupun Saiful. 

Oleh itu, inilah pesanan penulis kepada semua yang masih terkilan dengan keputusan mahkamah ini, iaitu yakinlah yang kita mempunyai pemimpin dan hakim yang bijak, berfikiran jauh dan dalam melangkaui apa yang tersurat di depan mata, demi yang terbaik untuk negara.  Jika ini tidak benar mana mungkin Malaysia kekal kukuh dan aman menghadapi segala tekanan luaran dan dalaman yang bertubi-tubi selama ini.   Sifat mengalah yang disangka sebagai lambang kebodohan Melayu adalah sebenarnya kebijaksanaan bagi orang-orang yang berfikir. 

Kini Anwar terpaksa merombak semula skrip “mahkamah tidak adil, kerajaan berkonspirasi, polis kejam” dan sebagainya.  Hancur harapannya untuk menggulingkan kerajaan melalui rusuhan.   Terkedu para sahabatnya di barat yang telah bersedia untuk menelan Malaysia.  Terduduk pemimpin PAS yang berangan untuk menggantikan Anwar.  Dan terkujat-kujat pemimpin DAP terpaksa mengubah strategi.   Tergamam Wan Azizah memikirkan lambat dan sukar lagilah baginya untuk menjadi First Lady.

Seluruh Pakatan Rakyat kini haru-biru kerana tidak ada alasan lagi untuk mencetuskan huru-hara.  Tanpa disangka wang yang telah dilaburkan untuk tujuan ini, lebur begitu saja.   Menggunakan skrip yang sama menuduh kerajaan kejam, berkonspirasi dan tidak adil untuk menghasut rakyat merusuh selepas episod ini, adalah tidak masuk akal sama sekali. 

Kini, mahu tidak mahu, Anwar terpaksa beradu tenaga sebagai anak jantan melalui jalan depan iaitu dalam pilihanraya.   Semua kehendak Anwar iaitu menggunakan dakwat kekal juga telah ditunaikan.   Apa lagi alasan Anwar untuk menghentam kerajaan? 

Anwar tahu dia sudah di’check-mate’, cuma penyokong-penyokongnya yang benak akal sahaja yang masih tidak menyedarinya. 

Siapa Kita?

Benarlah bahawa ‘Islam itu adalah untuk orang-orang yang bijak’ kerana orang-orang yang kurang bijak tidak mungkin dapat menyelami ilmu yang sebegitu tinggi di dalam Al-Quran.   Setiap yang diperintahkan semuanya mempunyai penjelasan yang logik dan kebaikan-kebaikan tersurat mahupun tersirat. 

Orang-orang yang bijak adalah orang-orang yang berfikir.  Dan orang-orang yang berfikir adalah orang-orang yang banyak bertanya.  Orang-orang yang banyak bertanya selalunya terdiri dari orang-orang yang banyak membaca. 

Sebagai seorang yang kerjanya adalah menulis, penulis juga perlu banyak membaca.   Walaupun pembacaan penulis tidaklah sebanyak dan sehebat para cendekiawan tetapi penulis ingin tegaskan bahawa membaca banyak membawa perubahan kepada diri penulis.

Membaca melatih otak meneliti ayat-ayat, memberi perhatian kepada perkataan-perkataan sebelum mencernanya sebagai satu pembentukan maklumat.  Latihan ini jika dilakukan berterusan akan membentuk pemikiran kritis dan rasa ingin tahu disebabkan minda itu dengan sendirinya bertindak mengupas dan menganalisa maklumat tersebut.  Lebih banyak membaca, lebih hebat minda itu bekerja dan sekali gus ia akan ‘meminta’ lebih maklumat lagi untuk kepuasan.   Namun, bahan bacaan yang dipilih juga memainkan peranan membentuk peribadi seseorang.  

Membaca novel-novel misteri misalnya, akan menjadikan minda kita lebih agresif dan ligat berfikir untuk cuba menyelesaikan misteri tersebut.  Novel romantik membuat minda kita terpana dan hanyut dalam impian.   Buku-buku ilmiah pula akan menjadikan kita seorang yang serius berfikir sementara bahan hiburan pula membantu merehatkan minda. 

Pendek kata, ‘Iqra’’ iaitu ‘bacalah’ adalah kunci segala-galanya kerana kewujudan manusia itu tidak bermakna jika mindanya tidak berfungsi dan untuk memaksimakan fungsi minda, tidak boleh tidak, harus bermula dengan membaca.  

Siapa diri kita terbentuk dari apa yang ada di dalam minda kita. 

Manusia tidak mengenal Allah S.W.T selagi tidak mengenali dirinya sendiri dan begitu juga sebaliknya.

Membaca dan menulis mengenai politik dan isu semasa juga memerlukan penulis menganalisa sikap manusia sekali gus memaksa penulis meneroka ke dalam diri sendiri. 

Ramai di antara kita yang cukup bijak mengupas mengenai diri orang lain, tetapi berapa ramaikah di antara kita yang boleh mengupas tentang diri sendiri secara jujur?   Seperti yang ditulis sebelum ini, ramai yang mengaku ikhlas bila berbuat sesuatu tetapi saban hari asyik merungut kerana tidak diiktiraf, tidak mendapat penghormatan, tidak dipuji atau tidak mendapat ganjaran. 

Ada juga yang menyatakan yang mereka tidak menuduh pendapat penulis salah tetapi di masa yang sama mengharapkan penulis dibukakan hati melihat kebenaran.   Bukankah ini sama saja dengan menghukum penulis sebagai salah dan mendabik dada sebagai berada di pihak yang benar?  Benarkah mereka ini tidak menghukum penulis berdasarkan penampilan luaran sepertimana yang mereka dendangkan?  

Penulis tidak berminat mengupas mengenai orang lain walaupun penulis tidak dapat mengelak dari mempunyai pendapat sendiri terhadap mereka.   Oleh itu, tulisan kali ini adalah untuk mengajak pembaca mengupas mengenai diri sendiri dan untuk itu, kenalilah diri penulis:  (Izinkan penulis menyambung dalam bahasa Inggeris). 

I understand that describing ourselves, especially the bad things, isn’t easy.  Most people just refuse to do it though they claim, or thought that they can do it.  We give and spread advice on our FB walls, emails and SMS to others, claiming that we are also advising ourselves.   But can we advice ourselves when we don’t even know that we are wrong? 

Sometimes, we think and claim that we are being humble while actually we are feeling hollier than our friends or the rest of the world.   It’s okay, as long as we notice it, acknowledge it, admit it, and ask for His forgiveness.   The problem is, when we don’t even realize that we are fooling ourselves into believing that we are truly a humble person. 

Describing ourselves in-depth needs a lot of thinking and courage to admit the worst.  Here’s what I can tell you about myself. 

We often heard how people complain about the greener grass on the other side of the fence.   And I have always wondered why I never think the same.   I’m never interested to look over the other side of the fence and I personally prefer a fully paved lawn because I just don’t do grass-cutting.  So who cares if my neigbour’s grass is green or any colour at all..

Now at 40, I still wonder whether not being interested in other people’s lawn makes me the most self-centered person or the most grateful person?   Most self-centered - as I don’t even bother what car the colleague of mine is driving and not noticing that my neighbor just bought a new car or things like that.  Most grateful - as I don’t get jealous or envious at anybody because I’m happy enough with what I have.   

I just couldn’t be bothered with the petty things about others that a close friend once said that, people who tried to show-off to me, often get frustrated because I just didn’t get the point of what they are trying to show-off about. 

This is the key point of describing myself and it explains why while in college, I was thought to be snobbish, arrogant and stuck-up by the girls in the next dorm and also in class.  But the girls in my dorm and those sitting closer to me in class laughed out at the thought of me being snobbish as they knew me as the craziest ‘thing’ they have ever come across in their life. 

I have close friends telling me that they hated me..I mean, rrreally hated me before they finally get to know me and found out that I’m actually funny and crazy and…weird? or different? whatever….talk about wrong impression!

I was once ‘hot and cold’ at the same time that someone described me as being ‘complicated’ – addictive but painful to be with…(phew! that came like a slap in the face though I have to ponder on the word ‘addictive’).  Thanks to him, I took note of the comment and changed, though it takes a while..

As I go through working life, I’ve been told to be hot-tempered – and I know that’s true but I believe that I’m managing my temper quite well as I grow older.   

I don’t hate people for no reasons but I hate hypocrisy.  I can tolerate a dumb-*ss with a good heart.  I can tolerate any character as long as they are true to themselves.   But I can’t tolerate arrogance because I really don’t understand what is there to be arrogance of? 

These are just some of my bad traits.  There are more of course.

By now, I think you all might have known that I’m an egoist and I don’t plan to change it just yet as I think a little bit of ego is good especially for women.  No, I’m not going to talk about my good traits because that would only boost my ego..and you wouldn’t like it.   But then, I think this ego of mine is what makes it okay for me to talk and admit about all the bad things about myself. 

There…it’s not that hard to talk bad about ourselves..  And now, I’m working hard to make a change – except for the ego part…(I kind of treasure it)

So, I hope that my point here is taken that is: Let’s spend more time thinking about ourselves, than others.  Ask yourself, what makes you, you?  Only then that you can strive for a change. 

Note

[NOTE:  Many friends of mine only know one side of me, that is the crazy, wacky side and that is why when they read my articles they couldn’t fit two and two together.   Well, I am a person of many sides… 

I just couldn’t believe that when I write about women, some thought that I’m having problems with my marriage??  When I write about Islam or aurat, some thought that I just got ‘hit’ by someone on the subject?? 

Friends…understand this:  I’m not the kind who gets offended easily.  What others think of me is their problem, not mine.  My writings are based on my observation, my thoughts and my opinions but not necessarily be about me.]